Ben

"I felt like for the first time I had control of what I was focused on. "

When I first came to Take a Hike in 2017, I felt like I was nobody. I was smoking a pack of cigarettes a day. I didn’t have goals, ambitions or really anything. I didn’t go to school, or have a job - I didn’t want to be seen. I didn’t want anything! 

When I joined Take a Hike I hated it. I left early every day and I was just about ready to drop out… until we went on our spring trip. 

Halfway through the 5-day trip I had a meltdown. I was done with Take a Hike. I would have paddled off that island if I could. I wanted to quit!  

The hardest thing was feeling stuck with things running through my mind. There was some hard stuff I'd been avoiding processing and accepting.  

Being out there in nature for five days straight there weren't a million other things calling my attention, and all those things I'd avoided so long started filling my mind. I was done with Take a Hike. I would have paddled off that island if I could. I wanted to quit!  

But I didn’t leave. Instead, the mental health clinician gave me the support to work things out, and time and space on my own. The staff trusted me to have a solo night and respected my need for time alone. I just sat on some rocks and watched otters swim by. I felt like for the first time I had control of what I was focused on.   

I decided to make the best of the situation and focus on myself and what I needed to do. That night I figured out a whole lot of things I needed to do. 

I had to quit smoking. I had to do my school work. I actually needed to care about myself the way my teachers and clinical clinician did. I needed to see myself the way they saw me. 

After the overnight solo I knew that I was going to get through it. That was definitely a turning point for me. 

Those 5 days gave me a chance to focus on myself instead of dealing with everything else going on in my life back home. I got to just be.  To be there for myself. 

It’s been a year since then and I’m about to head out on my last spring trip. I’m in a program to quit smoking. Every day I show up to class. I realised my meltdown was because of my anxiety.”  

On that trip Ben wrote letters to all the staff thanking them for how they had helped him. He even did some academic work to try to catch up on subjects he was falling behind in. And he also relaxed- he sat at the edge of the cliff and gazed out at the ocean and took it all in. He talked about being able to do that, and how appreciative he felt, how grateful he was to have that time to himself to reflect, and to just work things out.  

After that trip Ben experienced huge changes in his life. His school attendance increased to 100%, his attitude improved tenfold, he was happier, more motivated at school, and he took on a leadership role. He started to advocate for the program, and he spoke from his own experience about what it's like, and why it works.  

Ben graduated from Take a Hike. He is working full-time in hospitality right now and saving money to travel overseas before applying for post-secondary education next year. 

When asked what words of advice Ben would give to new students to the Take a Hike program, Ben said they just need stick it out:  

“ Take a Hike has taught me a lot but best of all, I’ve learned to be my own best friend and to support myself instead of always being against myself.   

You just have to focus on yourself and stick it out, and then it gets better. You just gotta remember that you're there to graduate high school. 

Take a Hike doesn’t just  teach you math and science. Take a Hike teaches you to be who you want to be, and how to get from where you are to where you want to go. 

They teach empathy. They teach patience. They teach you that the answers you need are within yourself. 

— Ben, Take a Hike alumni